花祭

Farewell Flowers

自从我在《智海浪花》中反复提及对花的偏爱，我的院子里、家里便挤满了别人送来的、真真假假的花。圆观送来了粉色的月季，晋美慈诚送来了黄色的秋菊……我的院子成了百花盛开的大观园。

Ever since I mentioned repeatedly my fondness of flowers in The Sprays of the Wisdom Ocean, gifts of flowers, real or artificial, started to fill the inside and outside of my house. Flowers like the China rose from Yuan Guan and the yellow chrysanthemum sent by Chimed Tsultrim turned my yard into a grand garden of blooming spectacles.

尽管早上出门很早，我也不会忘记给它们浇上一壶水。也许是我的“怜香惜玉”至真至诚，它们总报我以一院子的灿烂，在这秋日临近时分，院中仍浸润着夏日的氛围。

Even though I leave my house pretty early in the morning, I have always remembered to water the flowers. Perhaps touched by my sincerity and tender care, they have repaid me with a yard full of beautiful blossoms. With impending autumn in the air, my yard still maintained the glory of summer days.

今天下课回家，尚未走到院门，眼见平时紧闭的院门歪斜地敞开着，就有一种不祥的预感。走进院子，各色的花瓣洒落一地，一片狼藉。一只山羊躺在凋落的花丛里呼呼大睡，旁边的花盆里盛着它排泄的新鲜大便。这个调皮的家伙！

On my way back home after class today, at a distance I noticed the usually closed front gate was tilted ajar and a gloomy foreboding aroused in me. Once in the yard, a scene of a total mess of scattered petals struck me. A goat was snoring loudly among the fallen flowers and a nearby pot held its fresh excrement. Oh you naughty fellow!

仿佛失落了最心爱的宝贝，心一下子沮丧起来。我家里曾经多次被小偷光顾，偷走过不少价值昂贵的东西，但从来没有过今天这样的怅然，也许这源自于前世为蜜蜂的等流果吧。

My heart sank all at once, as if I had lost my most cherished belonging. Many times burglars had raided my house, taking away quite a few valuable items from me, but I have never felt as lost as today, a feeling perhaps predisposed by my having been a bee in previous lives.

“菩萨摩诃萨应当发如是心，谓我此身份于诸众生尚能舍弃，何况所有外财资具。”《罗延所问经》中的句子像顽皮的孩童在眼前晃来晃去，使我蓦然清醒。站在斑驳凌乱的花草中间，先前的心情雾一般渐渐消散，身心竟如释重负般有一种升腾的感觉。

“A Maha-bodhisattva should aspire as such: For the sake of beings I would be willing to offer even my own body and flesh, what needs to be said about offering my material possessions and other things?” This sentence from The Sutra Requested by Luoyan sprang up and bounced in front of me like a playful child. Suddenly my mind cleared up. Standing among the debris of the ravaged garden, my sadness dissipated like a fog vanishing; I felt a sense of relief and levitation, as if some heavy weight was being lifted from my heart and body.

隔壁的喇嘛也遭受了同样的厄运，他一边气咻咻地骂着，一边拿着石块想报仇，作为“同是天涯沦落人”的我，十分理解他的心情，但还是一边劝阻，一边赶紧将山羊送到他看不见的地方，让他眼不见，心不烦。

My next-door lama suffered the same misfortune. While letting loose a torrent of abuse, he was ready to seek revenge using a piece of rock in his hand. As someone sharing the same bitter experience, I could appreciate how he felt. Nonetheless, I tried to calm him down and at the same time pushed the goat to an inconspicuous corner, so at least the problem for my neighbor could be “out of sight, out of mind.”

早上还是姹紫嫣红的花园，现在已是红消香断、一遍残红。世间万物都是这么无常啊！喇嘛钦！

The garden, beautiful and luxuriant this morning, is now no longer existing and only messy petals remain. Isn’t everything in the world just as ephemeral? Lama chen!

壬午年七月初四　　
2002年8月12日 　

4th of July, Year of RenWu
August 12, 2002